Humint Events Online: Coming Soon? Possible Re-run of the Very Best TV Fakery of All Time!

Monday, November 03, 2008

Coming Soon? Possible Re-run of the Very Best TV Fakery of All Time!

by The Anonymous Physicist

Here we learn that private companies are vying for a $20 million prize to send a rover to the Moon by 2010. A leading candidate to take the prize is said to be a team from the Carnegie Mellon University's Robotics Institute in Pittsburgh. David Gump, President of Reston, Va. (near Langley) based Transformational Space Corp. is an “advisor” to the Carnegie Mellon team. The prize is called the CIA… er… I mean Google Lunar X Prize.

But let’s see who Gump’s company, Transformational Space Corp., appointed as CEO two years ago. It is Charles Duelfer. He was until 2005, “Director of Central Intelligence [CIA] for Iraq Weapons of Mass Destruction.” I guess he flunked attempts to plant nukes in Iraq, after trying from 2001-2005. Now is he going to fake Moon landings and "rovers?" Will they “dust off” the same old TV studio where the Apollo “Landings” were shot? Or will it be all CGI this time? Other articles say that their rover will take extra care not to trample on Apollo 11 astroNOTS Armstrong’s and Aldrin’s “lunar foorprints.” As a physicist, I wouldn’t anticipate any problems with avoiding those “footprints.” But who knows, that old TV studio could get crowded. Wouldn’t it be a pity if the new private rover fell onto Armstrong’s “lunar footprints”? Why I guess that would silence those who claim Apollo was a Hoax. Not.

So we may soon see a return to those glorious days of TV Fakery. They just don’t do it well today-- 9/11-- like they did in the old days. Oh, the nostalgia! Will we, in a mere two years, hear a paraphrasing of those famous words, “That’s one small rover for man, one giant rover for mankind.” Or lies to that effect. Stay tuned to a TV near you!

7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

ha ha!
i would still like to know why the lunar craters are all a uniformly shallow depth despite their varying diameters.

1:19 PM  
Blogger nickname said...

Aha, ap. If you're a physicist, then you should know that not all lunar craters "are all a uniformly shallow depth despite their varying diameters."

P.S. I do give you credit for modifying your prose since your "new" persona.

3:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

dude shut the fuck up - i am not A.P. and i have not modified anything and my persona is my own.

explain the uniform shallow depth of these craters genius.:

http://www.astrosurf.com/cidadao/moon_99_02_23_south.jpg

4:06 PM  
Blogger pteranodon said...

Moon dust meets air resistance:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eo66TOwxXGQ

6:09 AM  
Blogger nickname said...

The credit I gave you for modifying your prose is undeserved and therefore, under the circumstances, I'm taking it back.

You'll have to try much harder. Too many fingerprints everywhere.

9:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

and still, despite your having denied that the lunar craters are a uniform shallow depth and then being provided with a link proving that they are indeed, you cannot explain that.

here is a fingerprint for you.

5:27 PM  
Blogger nickname said...

A.P. told me not to say anything about that. "Shut the f--- up..."

7:01 PM  

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